Monday, April 09, 2012
EXAMINATION FEVER ( For Mahakali Voice)
Come March – April and temperatures begin to rise - all round! Especially in the homes of school-going children! The entire household is tense; gearing up for the impending exams. Tempers are frayed, Alarms are set, Timetables are prepared, TVs are switched off, guests are discretely unwelcome! Ipads, ipods, iphones are locked away as are cricket bats and tennis rackets!
The good old days of “Spare the rod and spoil the child” are long over. These are the days of the ‘solitaire’ kids. Mamas are on special leave taking special care of their kids at this very special time in their lives. So far so good. But things don’t end there. Some moms are seen studying with their kids, some also study on behalf of their kids!
Well I am no Counselor, nor psychiatrist! But I am a Mom and now a Grand-mom. And have accumulated a few words of wisdom along the way.
For Parents:
Children are what parents make them; you are their first and most important teachers. Children are smarter than you think; they are quick to pick up - both the good and the not so good! So always practice what you preach.
Training should start early; younger the child faster it learns! Give children the fundamentals, the values, the importance of Good Life Practices; to be Good Human Beings, Good Citizens, Good Students, Good Workers..........and leave the rest to them.
If you can imbibe these values in them, you have won half your battle. You teach them to dream, You do not dream for them. You teach them to take on responsibilities; Let them be responsible for their destinies! You allow them the freedom to think!
These days children are much too clever to fall for the ‘Carrot and Stick’ enticement and I am a staunch opposer of this practice. In the long term, the carrot decays and the stick breaks!
Also, as we have oft heard, Comparisons are odious – never make the mistake of comparing your kids to your neighbors’! Every child is different, unique – that is the universal truth!
When a child stands first in class, it is more a victory for you! It feels good; but every child cannot stand first. There are multifarious skills that a child may possess. If an Einstien is respected, so is a Sachin Tendulkar admired and a Lata Mangeshkar revered!
Discovering our child’s interests and talent and nurturing them is our duty. Fortunately today, new streams of study are opening up and a wide range of subjects is available for the child to choose from. With a little hard work one can do well in any field. Every child doesn’t have to become a doctor or an engineer!
Dialogue is important; talk to your child as often as possible. Give them a little advice – that is your prerogative; but also take feedback from them. It’s as important to listen as it is to talk to them. Create an atmosphere of confidence and trust on both sides. Try to read between the lines and into the minds! And you will no longer be ‘At War’, you will be on the same side! How wonderful would that be! Just imagine the ‘Peace’ at home!
For a start, Exam times need not be a nerve-racking, frustrating experience! You will be creating an atmosphere conducive for your child to grow and blossom! You will only need to supervise and ‘be there for them’ when they need you. No need to keep them in sight 24 x 7. Give them their space and have your own space too!
You have your career, your desires! You don’t have to sacrifice all your aspirations for the children or the family! I’ve seen too many moms who feel cheated that their lives have passed them by, just raising their children! This really need not happen. Learn to place more faith and have more confidence in your children! Make them independent. This will be rewarding to you both! A Win-Win situation!
For Children:
Remember, you are not studying for your parents. Doing well in school and college will only do YOU good. A few years of hard work now, will afford you a lifetime of success and comfort!
Of course there are no guarantees in life; but it is for you to do your best with honesty and diligence. Find your interests, set your goals and work towards them. Remember, If at first you don’t succeed, try, try, try again! Don’t let failure dishearten you – make it your stepping stone to success!
At the same time, bookworms can be dull. Take an active interest in games, sports, music - anything you have a flair for! The playground especially, will teach you more about life than any school – Not Winning, but Playing the game is important! Be an all-rounder! Be a Sport! Always look at the Brighter side! Winning and Losing are but two sides of the same coin!
Don’t feel shy of asking for help! Heed the advice of your older siblings, family, teachers. Look for a Role Model; someone you admire. Learn about them and try to emulate them wherever possible. Remember you have to become the Role Model for your younger siblings!
Finally, your parents, will always be there for you; whether you taste success or meet failure, YOU ARE ALWAYS WELCOME HOME!
The good old days of “Spare the rod and spoil the child” are long over. These are the days of the ‘solitaire’ kids. Mamas are on special leave taking special care of their kids at this very special time in their lives. So far so good. But things don’t end there. Some moms are seen studying with their kids, some also study on behalf of their kids!
Well I am no Counselor, nor psychiatrist! But I am a Mom and now a Grand-mom. And have accumulated a few words of wisdom along the way.
For Parents:
Children are what parents make them; you are their first and most important teachers. Children are smarter than you think; they are quick to pick up - both the good and the not so good! So always practice what you preach.
Training should start early; younger the child faster it learns! Give children the fundamentals, the values, the importance of Good Life Practices; to be Good Human Beings, Good Citizens, Good Students, Good Workers..........and leave the rest to them.
If you can imbibe these values in them, you have won half your battle. You teach them to dream, You do not dream for them. You teach them to take on responsibilities; Let them be responsible for their destinies! You allow them the freedom to think!
These days children are much too clever to fall for the ‘Carrot and Stick’ enticement and I am a staunch opposer of this practice. In the long term, the carrot decays and the stick breaks!
Also, as we have oft heard, Comparisons are odious – never make the mistake of comparing your kids to your neighbors’! Every child is different, unique – that is the universal truth!
When a child stands first in class, it is more a victory for you! It feels good; but every child cannot stand first. There are multifarious skills that a child may possess. If an Einstien is respected, so is a Sachin Tendulkar admired and a Lata Mangeshkar revered!
Discovering our child’s interests and talent and nurturing them is our duty. Fortunately today, new streams of study are opening up and a wide range of subjects is available for the child to choose from. With a little hard work one can do well in any field. Every child doesn’t have to become a doctor or an engineer!
Dialogue is important; talk to your child as often as possible. Give them a little advice – that is your prerogative; but also take feedback from them. It’s as important to listen as it is to talk to them. Create an atmosphere of confidence and trust on both sides. Try to read between the lines and into the minds! And you will no longer be ‘At War’, you will be on the same side! How wonderful would that be! Just imagine the ‘Peace’ at home!
For a start, Exam times need not be a nerve-racking, frustrating experience! You will be creating an atmosphere conducive for your child to grow and blossom! You will only need to supervise and ‘be there for them’ when they need you. No need to keep them in sight 24 x 7. Give them their space and have your own space too!
You have your career, your desires! You don’t have to sacrifice all your aspirations for the children or the family! I’ve seen too many moms who feel cheated that their lives have passed them by, just raising their children! This really need not happen. Learn to place more faith and have more confidence in your children! Make them independent. This will be rewarding to you both! A Win-Win situation!
For Children:
Remember, you are not studying for your parents. Doing well in school and college will only do YOU good. A few years of hard work now, will afford you a lifetime of success and comfort!
Of course there are no guarantees in life; but it is for you to do your best with honesty and diligence. Find your interests, set your goals and work towards them. Remember, If at first you don’t succeed, try, try, try again! Don’t let failure dishearten you – make it your stepping stone to success!
At the same time, bookworms can be dull. Take an active interest in games, sports, music - anything you have a flair for! The playground especially, will teach you more about life than any school – Not Winning, but Playing the game is important! Be an all-rounder! Be a Sport! Always look at the Brighter side! Winning and Losing are but two sides of the same coin!
Don’t feel shy of asking for help! Heed the advice of your older siblings, family, teachers. Look for a Role Model; someone you admire. Learn about them and try to emulate them wherever possible. Remember you have to become the Role Model for your younger siblings!
Finally, your parents, will always be there for you; whether you taste success or meet failure, YOU ARE ALWAYS WELCOME HOME!
# posted by rdbelite @ 4:09 AM 
